When you look in the mirror what do you see?  An extra five pounds beseeching yet another New Year’s resolution to lose weight?  A look of distaste that you’re still wearing last season’s fashion?  Why does it seem like women are always quick to point out the negative and forgetful of things otherwise wonderful and great?  Why does every new year prompt resolutions for change and transformation? Why do women not start the new year reminding themselves to continue being what they love about themselves? Understandably there’s always room for improvement and bad habits to kick for good, but constant self-criticism is NOT the way to celebrate yourself or the new year.

Instead of the continuous need to “be better,” we should remind ourselves to be happy with the way things are now, grateful for what we have instead of wistful for what we want.  In 2009, don’t allow yourself to starve for a high school reunion and don’t force yourself into debt for a new wardrobe makeover.  Let this new year be about loving you for who you are.

Take time periodically to think about all the great things that DO exist in your life and be thankful. You probably already have more clothes, shoes, makeup and jewelry than you can remember.  You may also have some great friendships or a fabulous job that you love.  Appreciate and make the most of what you have.  If you’re craving for something new or different, mix and match your wardrobe, try out new things with your friends, or seek out a new opportunity at work.  This is a year to treasure what you already have and to appreciate the simple joys of life. So go out there into the new year and love yourself!

 

There is always room for growth, but don’t forget what is already great NOW. There is always the need to be better than others. Competition lies in our genetic code.  The drive to be a part of the fittest and the finest is intrinsic to being human.  We want to be smarter, prettier, taller, funnier, and happier than those around us — but if we keep comparing ourselves to others,  we’ll never be satisfied.  Keeping up with the Joneses will only make you more miserable.  Forget how others are living and look at how you are living.  If it’s already great, why change?  While it is always necessary to assess what areas in life need improvement, there’s a fine line between self-improvement and self-demoralization.  Signing up for the gym is great if you know it will improve your health, but signing up just so you can be thinner than your roommate will not lead to deep personal satisfaction. 

You’re great the way you are. Really!  A part of us loves us, and another part is a perfectionist that rears its head at the most unexpected times.  One moment we give ourselves a smile and wink at our reflection and another moment we might give a snarl and a sigh.  Take time every morning to make yourself look your best so that everyday has a beautiful, energetic start.  If wearing glasses and sweats to the office makes you feel sluggish and gross, then take the time to put on contacts and slacks to boost your confidence and self-esteem.  You are a strong and engaging human being, so don’t sell yourself short.

Build confidence. So the next time you go to the mirror, look at yourself again and give a big smile.  Be confident that the person you see in front of you is someone that is seen as beautiful by others as well.  Know that you have control and power over how you feel and how you project yourself to others.  By loving yourself, the relationships you build are rooted in genuine friendship and love instead of resentment or jealousy.  By setting an example, you can help others see themselves in a new light.